The one thing that kept me from going under

Good Morning {{first_name}},

When everything in your life is falling apart — what's the one thing you keep doing?

Not because you feel like it. Not because someone told you to. But because somewhere deep down you know that if you stop doing that one thing, you might not find your way back.

Everyone has one. And the one thing it is never — is isolation.

I learned that lesson twice. The hard way first, and then the right way.

When I left the Marine Corps I didn't have an anchor. My family was in a different time zone. I didn't reach out to anyone. I just sat alone with my thoughts, ruminating on whether I had made the right decision, replaying every doubt, letting the silence get loud. And because I had no one to say any of it out loud to, my thinking got darker and my decisions got worse. I wasn't processing. I was drowning quietly and calling it strength.

That's what isolation does to a man. It doesn't just leave him alone, it leaves him alone with the worst version of his own thoughts on a loop.

It's not a coincidence that men's suicide rates are as high as they are. Isolation is the common thread. Not weakness. Not failure. Isolation.

When my marriage ended and when I was lying in a hospital bed with myelitis, I chose to do something different. I'm an introvert. I recharge alone. And yet I made myself reach out to someone almost every single day.

Not to get advice. Not to be fixed. Just to say out loud how I was actually doing.

I would call or text someone and just let go of whatever emotional weight I was carrying that day. No agenda. No solution required. Just a simple here's where I am today. And somehow, every time, I felt a little lighter.

That was my anchor. Connection.

Yours might look completely different.

Maybe it's your daily workout; the one you do on three hours of sleep or on your worst days, because the discipline of showing up for yourself is the thread that holds everything else together.

Maybe it's how you greet your kids first thing in the morning. The way you set the tone for their day before the world gets to them. Or how you hug them before bed no matter what kind of day you had — because that moment reminds you what you're actually doing all of this for.

Whatever it is, that anchor is not an accident. It's the thing your gut has been telling you matters most. The thing that keeps you human when the storm is trying to make you disappear into yourself.

The men who navigate hard seasons best aren't the ones without problems. They're the ones who know what their anchor is and they protect it like their life depends on it. Because it kind of does.

If you've never sat down and actually thought about what your anchor is — or what your life would look like if you built it on a foundation you actually chose — that's exactly what we're doing together on Thursday July 19th at 7pm.

Forging the Foundation is a free one-hour webinar where we're going to figure out what your life actually looks and feels like when it's working. Not the life you fell into. The one you'd choose.

Expect practical application. You'll walk away with something real to work on.

Reply to this email and I'll send you the link personally.

Still in it with you,

Matt
Choose to Live, Love & Grow